Tonight at 10AM, improv group King Friday will be donating all of the proceeds from their monthly BYOB pay-what-you-can show at Studio 34 in West Philadelphia to UNICEF. [show info]

The N Crowd will donate proceeds to Red Cross from their weekly show at The Actors Center tomorrow evening at 8PM [show info].

And on Saturday night at 7:30 [show info] and 10PM [show info], ComedySportz will donate proceeds to Mercy Corps.

It’s also worth noting that there is another benefit this weekend. Pat House, Carolyn Busa, Chip Chantry and Jared Bilski will be performing on Saturday to benefit The Children of Marjorie Gormley Goodwin Fund. [show info]

Don’t believe them that he’s awesome? Perhaps this clip will persuade you.

Doogie Horner, stand-up, host of The Ministry of Secret Jokes

5. Henry Foley vs. Luke Giordano at the Raven Lounge debate

The Raven debate is always entertaining, but this match was especially interesting because of the contestant’s diametrically opposite approaches. The debate was, Who would be a better wingman: Darth Vader or Scorpion from Mortal Kombat? Luke had Vader and Foley had Scorpion. Foley took an early lead as the crowd favorite, being very personable and friendly, and clearly having fun. Luke came in all business. He appeared confident that his superior knowledge of Star Wars would give him an edge, but it actually worked against him since the crowd didn’t know what the fuck he was talking about. Foley easily walked all over him until the final round when he suggested that Scorpion would use his trademark “Get over here!” move to snare women from across the bar. The crowd thought that was really funny until Luke—in a stunning comeback—explained that what Foley had described was basically ninja rape.

4. Roger Snair beating Gregg Gethard in a Yo Mamma Battle at the Fringe Cabaret.

This show was kind of an uphill battle, because a large portion of the audience were artsy people who’d come to the cabaret to see interpretive dance and such. They did get to see some of that, but they also saw one of the dirtiest—and awesomest—yo mamma battles I’ve ever seen.

The battle started with a pack of eight that slowly whittled down to two players in the final round: Gregg Gethard vs. Roger Snair. Gregg’s Yo Mama snaps were very creative. They were actually long, rambling short stories more than “snaps.” One of them was (and I’m paraphrasing) “Yo Mama asked if she could be my slave. I said yes. Then she asked me how much she’d be getting paid, which means she doesn’t understand the meaning of the word “slave.” So I drowned her in the fountain outside the Cherry Hill Mall. Lots of people saw her dead body floating there, and they laughed, because it’s weird to see a dead body somewhere like that where you don’t expect to see it.”

Roger’s snaps were very short, and also creative in their own way, but totally different than Gregg’s: “Yo Mama is so ugly, the WNBA won’t let her play.” “Yo Mama is so stinky, skunks think she smells.” Near the end, you could tell he had obviously run out of snaps, and was making them up on the spot. He would speak haltingly, his eyes looking up at the ceiling, clearly unsure what his next words would be. “Your Mama . . . is sooooo stinky . . .” a long pause, then his eyes would light up, “she can clear a room!” The crowd loved the genuine, guileless enthusiasm he exuded.

Like Henry and Luke’s debate, it was a great battle because the two comics had very original styles that were polar opposites. Roger wasn’t even originally scheduled to battle, he just jumped in. And fucking nailed it.

3. Bing Supernova

Chip Chantry’s alter ego Bing Supernova has been around for a while, but it wasn’t until this year Bing really found his groove. Bing tells the jokes Chip Chantry can write but never tell because he’s too nice. “Have you ever gotten an erection in a place you shouldn’t? Like your mouth?” His Michael Jordan joke is incredible, so is his “When I fight, I telegraph my moves,” joke, but I don’t want to ruin either of them here. My hope is that Bing Supernova becomes so famous that he completely overshadows Chip Chantry, forcing Chip to wear a beret and blazer and scream obscene anti-semitic jokes for the rest of his career—which, actually, isn’t such an awful fate.

2. John Kensil’s Chicken Nuggets joke

“You know, when you go through the McDonald’s drive-thru late at night, the service isn’t always the best. I got some chicken nuggets from there a couple nights ago. I’m driving home and one of the nuggets starts to ring.” (pantomimes picking up a phone) “Hello?” “Hey, tell Duane I’ve got his Blockbuster card.”

1. The WID at the Ministry of Secret Jokes

The WID is my favorite comedian of all time (sorry Bob Hope, wherever you are). But my admiration and respect for his comedy reached a new height after seeing him do a half hour at the Ministry of Secret Jokes Bachelor Party (full disclosure—the bachelor party was mine). The room was packed, it was the end of the show, and crowd was a little rowdy. The WID got off to a smooth start, telling a few marriage jokes: “Doogie said when he gets home he’s going to rip Jen’s underwear off. The elastic waistband is killing him.”

Then he brought out the props.

If you’ve never seen the WID before, he dumps huge containers of props all over the stage and then makes lighting fast puns about them. For instance, at one point he angrily shook a pair of small shoes at the crowd. “Who put these here? Who put these here? Oh you little sneaks.” His jokes are very fast, and he’s incredible at thinking on his feet. Which came in handy when this drunk in the front row started making fun of the WID’s pants. So the WID said “Hey, stop looking at my pants. Or as they say in Spain, ‘Leave my pantalones.’” The crowd loved it. Making fun of the WID on stage is like standing between a mother grizzly and her cub, if grizzlies told jokes while they mauled you. This guy in the front kept fucking with the WID—talking during the show, not laughing—and the WID didn’t miss a beat, he’d make fun of the dude and then slip right back into the act. At one point he held up a white trash bag and said “Here, you can hang out with the rest of the white trash,” before dropping it at the guy’s feet. The guy wanted to murder the WID, but then the WID would say something so funny the guy had to laugh. That’s powerful comedy, taking someone who wants to punch you and making them laugh.

I’ve seen plenty of comics get lengthy applause breaks, but before that night I’d never seen a comedian have to pause because people were loudly chanting his name—WID! WID! WID! And then the WID would scream “bring up more props!” and three guys would bring giant tupperware containers on stage and he’d spill them everywhere and keep going. Nobody follows the WID, because there’s nowhere to stand on the stage.

Kent Haines’ Top 5 Jokes of 2009

It’s hard for me to remember if these jokes were all written in 2009, but they’re the 5 jokes that made me laugh the hardest.

5. Chip Chantry – Wheel of Fortune
If I had to point to a single joke in Chip’s act that exemplifies his sense of humor and persona, I’d pick this one. His Wheel of Fortune bit does an excellent job of establishing his sensibility with the crowd and giving them a taste of what’s to come. And structurally, it’s airtight. The type of joke you can only write when you have gained an intuitive feel for stand-up.

4. Joey Dougherty – Self-Esteem
Again, this joke instantly gives the crowd an insight into Joey as a comedian and a person. The Philly scene has a lot of ramblers, but Joey understands the economy of words and getting straight to the heart of a joke. I’ll be quoting this joke to friends for a long time.

3. Darryl Charles – Asparagus
Darryl has really impressed me this year, but this joke in particular keeps me laughing every time I see it. Darryl’s performance takes a solid premise and elevates it wonderfully.

2. Luke Giordano – Boba Fett
Boba Fett was a solid joke. Luke did it for months, and it always got a decent response. And then he ripped it apart and rewrote it from scratch, turning a good bit into a killer bit. I am really impressed with Luke’s commitment to get every drop out of a joke, as well as his willingness to throw out good jokes and search for better ones.

1. Anton Shuford – Baseball
Anton won Philly’s Phunniest this year, and it’s this joke that shows why he deserves it. Anton plays a game with the crowd where he exposes bigger and bigger flaws in his character and dares the crowd to stop liking him. And night after night, they can’t. In fact, they love him even more for it. Just a fantastically written story.

Gregg Gethard’s Top 5 Philly Comedy’s Best Moments for 2009

1.) Doogie Horner’s Bachelor Party Ministry of Secret Jokes: Top to bottom the best comedy show I’ve ever been to, let alone a part of.

2.) David Ray’s performance at Helium’s contest: A true “Where the f did this guy come from” moment.

3.) An Evening at Applebee’s Bedtime Stories: The best BS of the year, including a breakout appearance from the debuting Chris Cru Thick.

4.) Anything involving Bing Supernova.

5.) Emily and Micah’s performance at the Shubin.

Brian Craig of Secret Pants

5. – The “Kick the Keg” Backyard Show
With half a keg leftover from a show the previous night, Chip Chantry and Johnny Goodtimes decided to throw together a short-notice, by-invitation-only comedy show in Johnny’s backyard (which is the size of my bedroom). An incredibly awesome, incredibly intimate night of hilarity ensued. Twenty years from now, everybody will claim to have been there.

4. – Emily & Micah McGraw
When we were choosing acts to open for our two Shubin shows in November, we just went with people that we wanted to watch. Emily and Micah were at the very top of the list. And beyond the hilarious, catchy tunes, these guys are just plain adorable. My favorite songs: “Cat on the Street”, “Tasers”, “America”

3. – The Philadelphia Comedy Community
This is kind of a holdover from 2008, but the Philly comedy group-o’-friends really solidified this year. Not only were there some really great monthly shows (like Chip’s “One Man Show”, Gregg Gethard’s “Bedtime Stories”, and Kent Haines’ late “Why Am I Not Famous??!??”), but there were also some wonderful social gatherings, such as Aaron Hertzog’s Super Bowl get-together, Dave Walk’s Halloween party and everyone getting together at Murph’s to watch the Phillies during the post-season. The sketch and stand-up sub-communities have become fast friends and I wouldn’t be surprised if 2010 brought with it some very interesting and exciting collaborations.

2. – Aaron Hertzog, the handsomest man you ever did see
I have no hesitation in predicting that Aaron will be the next big thing to come out of Philadelphia. He is easily one of the best jokesmiths in the city and he has a comfortable stage presence. Almost all of my favorite jokes right now belong to Aaron. To list a few: the “Hide-and-Go-Seek Killer” bit, his bit about how he’s an unlikely abduction target, the story about his mom bringing him a clean pair of pants to work, and, of course, his “handsomest man” intro.

1. – Secret Pants, five years deep / Brian Kelly’s 30th birthday show
2009 marked our fifth year together as a group, effectively culminating in a montage Paul cobbled together to surprise BK onstage for his birthday during our show at the Shubin. We’ve come a long way together, from fresh-faced college graduates to balding, tired semi-grownups with jobs, responsibilities, and, for more than half of us, mortgages. I’ve really enjoyed growing up with these guys and it’s an honor to be able to create funny stuff with them on a regular basis. And the added bonus of being in this group of exceptionally talented people is that we’ve had the opportunity, especially this year, to perform alongside some amazing comedians and sketch groups. Hitting the five-year mark made me look back on all the people we’ve met and become friends with and I’d do it all again in a heartbeat. Thanks, guys. You’re true blue.

---

]]> As we count down the hours until 2010, here are more Top 5 of 2009 lists from Philadelphia comedians.

Doogie Horner, stand-up, host of The Ministry of Secret Jokes

5. Henry Foley vs. Luke Giordano at the Raven Lounge debate

The Raven debate is always entertaining, but this match was especially interesting because of the contestant’s diametrically opposite approaches. The debate was, Who would be a better wingman: Darth Vader or Scorpion from Mortal Kombat? Luke had Vader and Foley had Scorpion. Foley took an early lead as the crowd favorite, being very personable and friendly, and clearly having fun. Luke came in all business. He appeared confident that his superior knowledge of Star Wars would give him an edge, but it actually worked against him since the crowd didn’t know what the fuck he was talking about. Foley easily walked all over him until the final round when he suggested that Scorpion would use his trademark “Get over here!” move to snare women from across the bar. The crowd thought that was really funny until Luke—in a stunning comeback—explained that what Foley had described was basically ninja rape.

4. Roger Snair beating Gregg Gethard in a Yo Mamma Battle at the Fringe Cabaret.

This show was kind of an uphill battle, because a large portion of the audience were artsy people who’d come to the cabaret to see interpretive dance and such. They did get to see some of that, but they also saw one of the dirtiest—and awesomest—yo mamma battles I’ve ever seen.

The battle started with a pack of eight that slowly whittled down to two players in the final round: Gregg Gethard vs. Roger Snair. Gregg’s Yo Mama snaps were very creative. They were actually long, rambling short stories more than “snaps.” One of them was (and I’m paraphrasing) “Yo Mama asked if she could be my slave. I said yes. Then she asked me how much she’d be getting paid, which means she doesn’t understand the meaning of the word “slave.” So I drowned her in the fountain outside the Cherry Hill Mall. Lots of people saw her dead body floating there, and they laughed, because it’s weird to see a dead body somewhere like that where you don’t expect to see it.”

Roger’s snaps were very short, and also creative in their own way, but totally different than Gregg’s: “Yo Mama is so ugly, the WNBA won’t let her play.” “Yo Mama is so stinky, skunks think she smells.” Near the end, you could tell he had obviously run out of snaps, and was making them up on the spot. He would speak haltingly, his eyes looking up at the ceiling, clearly unsure what his next words would be. “Your Mama . . . is sooooo stinky . . .” a long pause, then his eyes would light up, “she can clear a room!” The crowd loved the genuine, guileless enthusiasm he exuded.

Like Henry and Luke’s debate, it was a great battle because the two comics had very original styles that were polar opposites. Roger wasn’t even originally scheduled to battle, he just jumped in. And fucking nailed it.

3. Bing Supernova

Chip Chantry’s alter ego Bing Supernova has been around for a while, but it wasn’t until this year Bing really found his groove. Bing tells the jokes Chip Chantry can write but never tell because he’s too nice. “Have you ever gotten an erection in a place you shouldn’t? Like your mouth?” His Michael Jordan joke is incredible, so is his “When I fight, I telegraph my moves,” joke, but I don’t want to ruin either of them here. My hope is that Bing Supernova becomes so famous that he completely overshadows Chip Chantry, forcing Chip to wear a beret and blazer and scream obscene anti-semitic jokes for the rest of his career—which, actually, isn’t such an awful fate.

2. John Kensil’s Chicken Nuggets joke

“You know, when you go through the McDonald’s drive-thru late at night, the service isn’t always the best. I got some chicken nuggets from there a couple nights ago. I’m driving home and one of the nuggets starts to ring.” (pantomimes picking up a phone) “Hello?” “Hey, tell Duane I’ve got his Blockbuster card.”

1. The WID at the Ministry of Secret Jokes

The WID is my favorite comedian of all time (sorry Bob Hope, wherever you are). But my admiration and respect for his comedy reached a new height after seeing him do a half hour at the Ministry of Secret Jokes Bachelor Party (full disclosure—the bachelor party was mine). The room was packed, it was the end of the show, and crowd was a little rowdy. The WID got off to a smooth start, telling a few marriage jokes: “Doogie said when he gets home he’s going to rip Jen’s underwear off. The elastic waistband is killing him.”

Then he brought out the props.

If you’ve never seen the WID before, he dumps huge containers of props all over the stage and then makes lighting fast puns about them. For instance, at one point he angrily shook a pair of small shoes at the crowd. “Who put these here? Who put these here? Oh you little sneaks.” His jokes are very fast, and he’s incredible at thinking on his feet. Which came in handy when this drunk in the front row started making fun of the WID’s pants. So the WID said “Hey, stop looking at my pants. Or as they say in Spain, ‘Leave my pantalones.’” The crowd loved it. Making fun of the WID on stage is like standing between a mother grizzly and her cub, if grizzlies told jokes while they mauled you. This guy in the front kept fucking with the WID—talking during the show, not laughing—and the WID didn’t miss a beat, he’d make fun of the dude and then slip right back into the act. At one point he held up a white trash bag and said “Here, you can hang out with the rest of the white trash,” before dropping it at the guy’s feet. The guy wanted to murder the WID, but then the WID would say something so funny the guy had to laugh. That’s powerful comedy, taking someone who wants to punch you and making them laugh.

I’ve seen plenty of comics get lengthy applause breaks, but before that night I’d never seen a comedian have to pause because people were loudly chanting his name—WID! WID! WID! And then the WID would scream “bring up more props!” and three guys would bring giant tupperware containers on stage and he’d spill them everywhere and keep going. Nobody follows the WID, because there’s nowhere to stand on the stage.

Kent Haines’ Top 5 Jokes of 2009

It’s hard for me to remember if these jokes were all written in 2009, but they’re the 5 jokes that made me laugh the hardest.

5. Chip Chantry – Wheel of Fortune
If I had to point to a single joke in Chip’s act that exemplifies his sense of humor and persona, I’d pick this one. His Wheel of Fortune bit does an excellent job of establishing his sensibility with the crowd and giving them a taste of what’s to come. And structurally, it’s airtight. The type of joke you can only write when you have gained an intuitive feel for stand-up.

4. Joey Dougherty – Self-Esteem
Again, this joke instantly gives the crowd an insight into Joey as a comedian and a person. The Philly scene has a lot of ramblers, but Joey understands the economy of words and getting straight to the heart of a joke. I’ll be quoting this joke to friends for a long time.

3. Darryl Charles – Asparagus
Darryl has really impressed me this year, but this joke in particular keeps me laughing every time I see it. Darryl’s performance takes a solid premise and elevates it wonderfully.

2. Luke Giordano – Boba Fett
Boba Fett was a solid joke. Luke did it for months, and it always got a decent response. And then he ripped it apart and rewrote it from scratch, turning a good bit into a killer bit. I am really impressed with Luke’s commitment to get every drop out of a joke, as well as his willingness to throw out good jokes and search for better ones.

1. Anton Shuford – Baseball
Anton won Philly’s Phunniest this year, and it’s this joke that shows why he deserves it. Anton plays a game with the crowd where he exposes bigger and bigger flaws in his character and dares the crowd to stop liking him. And night after night, they can’t. In fact, they love him even more for it. Just a fantastically written story.

Gregg Gethard’s Top 5 Philly Comedy’s Best Moments for 2009

1.) Doogie Horner’s Bachelor Party Ministry of Secret Jokes: Top to bottom the best comedy show I’ve ever been to, let alone a part of.

2.) David Ray’s performance at Helium’s contest: A true “Where the f did this guy come from” moment.

3.) An Evening at Applebee’s Bedtime Stories: The best BS of the year, including a breakout appearance from the debuting Chris Cru Thick.

4.) Anything involving Bing Supernova.

5.) Emily and Micah’s performance at the Shubin.

Brian Craig of Secret Pants

5. – The “Kick the Keg” Backyard Show
With half a keg leftover from a show the previous night, Chip Chantry and Johnny Goodtimes decided to throw together a short-notice, by-invitation-only comedy show in Johnny’s backyard (which is the size of my bedroom). An incredibly awesome, incredibly intimate night of hilarity ensued. Twenty years from now, everybody will claim to have been there.

4. – Emily & Micah McGraw
When we were choosing acts to open for our two Shubin shows in November, we just went with people that we wanted to watch. Emily and Micah were at the very top of the list. And beyond the hilarious, catchy tunes, these guys are just plain adorable. My favorite songs: “Cat on the Street”, “Tasers”, “America”

3. – The Philadelphia Comedy Community
This is kind of a holdover from 2008, but the Philly comedy group-o’-friends really solidified this year. Not only were there some really great monthly shows (like Chip’s “One Man Show”, Gregg Gethard’s “Bedtime Stories”, and Kent Haines’ late “Why Am I Not Famous??!??”), but there were also some wonderful social gatherings, such as Aaron Hertzog’s Super Bowl get-together, Dave Walk’s Halloween party and everyone getting together at Murph’s to watch the Phillies during the post-season. The sketch and stand-up sub-communities have become fast friends and I wouldn’t be surprised if 2010 brought with it some very interesting and exciting collaborations.

2. – Aaron Hertzog, the handsomest man you ever did see
I have no hesitation in predicting that Aaron will be the next big thing to come out of Philadelphia. He is easily one of the best jokesmiths in the city and he has a comfortable stage presence. Almost all of my favorite jokes right now belong to Aaron. To list a few: the “Hide-and-Go-Seek Killer” bit, his bit about how he’s an unlikely abduction target, the story about his mom bringing him a clean pair of pants to work, and, of course, his “handsomest man” intro.

1. – Secret Pants, five years deep / Brian Kelly’s 30th birthday show
2009 marked our fifth year together as a group, effectively culminating in a montage Paul cobbled together to surprise BK onstage for his birthday during our show at the Shubin. We’ve come a long way together, from fresh-faced college graduates to balding, tired semi-grownups with jobs, responsibilities, and, for more than half of us, mortgages. I’ve really enjoyed growing up with these guys and it’s an honor to be able to create funny stuff with them on a regular basis. And the added bonus of being in this group of exceptionally talented people is that we’ve had the opportunity, especially this year, to perform alongside some amazing comedians and sketch groups. Hitting the five-year mark made me look back on all the people we’ve met and become friends with and I’d do it all again in a heartbeat. Thanks, guys. You’re true blue.

]]> http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/12/31/top-5-lists-of-2009-yet-even-more/feed/ 3 http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/12/21/top-5-lists-of-2009-3/ http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/12/21/top-5-lists-of-2009-3/#comments Mon, 21 Dec 2009 12:44:18 +0000 Dave Walk http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/12/21/top-5-lists-of-2009-3/ As we continue to count down 2009, the TOP 5 lists keep coming…

Ben Maher, co-founder/co-producer of Philly Sketchfest

5. “WEIRD AL” YANKOVIC goes viral. It was great to see “Weird Al” debut an EP’s worth of new songs in video form on the internet, and once again gain a whole new generation of fans as he continues to spoof popular music better than anyone else.

4. LOCAL SHOWS continue to spotlight the best Philly has to offer. The Philadelphia comedy scene continues to prove that not only is it filled with hilarious comedians, but that it supports its own better than anywhere else. Shows such as Chip Chantry’s One Man Show (with Special Guests), Bedtime Stories, Ministry of Secret Jokes, Guilty Pleasures, Hey Everybody! and more showcase the amazing talent Philly has to offer. (and props to the venues that put them on like Khyber, PHIT, Connie’s Ric Rac, etc.)

3. KENT HAINES on Comedy Central. National exposure for Philadelphia comedy, featuring one of our funniest and most intelligent comics? Love it.

2. PAT HOUSE INTROS featuring the various incarnations of John Kensil. Absolutely awesome, nonstop hilarious and I hope they never end. The only time I laughed more than this all year was…

1. BING SUPERNOVA at PHILLY SKETCHFEST late show, Saturday night. (go ahead and call me biased, but PSF lucked out to have this performance. It would rank in this spot no matter where it was) A mighty juggernaut of over the top, tear inducing, stomach cramping laughs. This was the funniest 15 minutes of comedy I have seen in years, and the crowd agreed. Mr. Supernova graced this show with his presence, and we are all better for it. Bing Supernova, we thank you.

Honorable Mentions:
The STATE on DVD! (Finally!) & CINEMATIC TITANIC selling out at the Troc!

---

]]> As we continue to count down 2009, the TOP 5 lists keep coming…

Ben Maher, co-founder/co-producer of Philly Sketchfest

5. “WEIRD AL” YANKOVIC goes viral. It was great to see “Weird Al” debut an EP’s worth of new songs in video form on the internet, and once again gain a whole new generation of fans as he continues to spoof popular music better than anyone else.

4. LOCAL SHOWS continue to spotlight the best Philly has to offer. The Philadelphia comedy scene continues to prove that not only is it filled with hilarious comedians, but that it supports its own better than anywhere else. Shows such as Chip Chantry’s One Man Show (with Special Guests), Bedtime Stories, Ministry of Secret Jokes, Guilty Pleasures, Hey Everybody! and more showcase the amazing talent Philly has to offer. (and props to the venues that put them on like Khyber, PHIT, Connie’s Ric Rac, etc.)

3. KENT HAINES on Comedy Central. National exposure for Philadelphia comedy, featuring one of our funniest and most intelligent comics? Love it.

2. PAT HOUSE INTROS featuring the various incarnations of John Kensil. Absolutely awesome, nonstop hilarious and I hope they never end. The only time I laughed more than this all year was…

1. BING SUPERNOVA at PHILLY SKETCHFEST late show, Saturday night. (go ahead and call me biased, but PSF lucked out to have this performance. It would rank in this spot no matter where it was) A mighty juggernaut of over the top, tear inducing, stomach cramping laughs. This was the funniest 15 minutes of comedy I have seen in years, and the crowd agreed. Mr. Supernova graced this show with his presence, and we are all better for it. Bing Supernova, we thank you.

Honorable Mentions:
The STATE on DVD! (Finally!) & CINEMATIC TITANIC selling out at the Troc!

]]> http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/12/21/top-5-lists-of-2009-3/feed/ 1 http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/30/the-philadelphia-comedians-twitter-list/ http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/30/the-philadelphia-comedians-twitter-list/#comments Fri, 30 Oct 2009 17:39:50 +0000 Dave Walk http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/?p=3123 Perhaps you’ve heard of this Twitter thing that Oprah mentioned a few months ago. It allows anyone to post whatever they want in 140 characters or less. Naturally, it’s a great medium for comedians to try out jokes. Recently a website just for this purpose, Witstream, launched with Michael Ian Black as “Chief Content Officer.”

Just yesterday Twitter launched a new lists feature in which any user can create a custom list of accounts. So I took it upon myself to make a Philadelphia comedians list that makes it easy to follow all of the stand-up, sketch and improv comedians in Philadelphia that are on Twitter (there are 42 in all).

Some comics “tweet” about upcoming shows and others use it to just be funny. Some of my favorites of late:

If you’re know of someone that isn’t on the list but should be, feel free to comment below or e-mail comicvsaudience@gmail.com to be added.

And in related news, profiles in the database that contained a Twitter name aren’t loading correctly. I should be able to fix this this weekend.

---

]]> Perhaps you’ve heard of this Twitter thing that Oprah mentioned a few months ago. It allows anyone to post whatever they want in 140 characters or less. Naturally, it’s a great medium for comedians to try out jokes. Recently a website just for this purpose, Witstream, launched with Michael Ian Black as “Chief Content Officer.”

Just yesterday Twitter launched a new lists feature in which any user can create a custom list of accounts. So I took it upon myself to make a Philadelphia comedians list that makes it easy to follow all of the stand-up, sketch and improv comedians in Philadelphia that are on Twitter (there are 42 in all).

Some comics “tweet” about upcoming shows and others use it to just be funny. Some of my favorites of late:

If you’re know of someone that isn’t on the list but should be, feel free to comment below or e-mail comicvsaudience@gmail.com to be added.

And in related news, profiles in the database that contained a Twitter name aren’t loading correctly. I should be able to fix this this weekend.

]]> http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/30/the-philadelphia-comedians-twitter-list/feed/ 0 http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/29/actually-read-it-dirty-jokes-every-man-should-know-edited-by-doogie-horner/ http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/29/actually-read-it-dirty-jokes-every-man-should-know-edited-by-doogie-horner/#comments Thu, 29 Oct 2009 17:31:37 +0000 Dave Walk http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/?p=3112 By this time, it appears that we’ve heard everything dirty that you can imagine. Although people are still offended by jokes in certain contexts, there aren’t too many things that are surprisingly too dirty. But that doesn’t mean that dirty jokes aren’t still funny, which Philly stand-up Doogie Horner (profile) shows in the book that he has edited Dirty Jokes Every Man Should Know. Published by Philadelphia’s Quirk Books, where Horner is a graphic designer, the book is a portable compendium of mostly sex jokes taken from various sources (FULL DISCLOSURE: I let Doogie borrow of few of my old joke books), but also features a set of Willie Nelson jokes from comic Chip Chantry (profile). Philly comics Roger Weaver and Conrad Roth (who has since moved to San Francisco) are also thanked, although it’s unclear which jokes they contributed. I tossed a few questions to Doogie by e-mail recently to find out more about the process and allure of dirty jokes. Suffice to say this post is NSFW.

1. Are dirty jokes as relevant as they used to be?

I wouldn’t say they’re less relevant than they used to be, but they’re certainly less uncommon. Fifty years ago there was a distinction between dirty jokes and regular jokes, but these days a lot of jokes that used to be considered dirty are almost quaint.

When I first started the book, I submitted modern dirty jokes, jokes about cancer, pedophilia, rape, murder. And the editors said “Uh, not that dirty.” They wanted jokes that were just kind of ribald.

So, the jokes in the book are definitely throwback jokes, because their smut is old-timey. Also, they needed to be jokes that anyone can tell, that depend on the language, not the delivery. And by nature those kind of jokes are the old Catskill kind. Anyone can tell them.

2. Deep down inside, what do you think it is about dirty jokes that appeals to people?

They’re shocking, they’re naughty. You’re getting away with something when you tell one. You’re not supposed to say “poopy,” but you’re saying it anyways! It gives you a little thrill.

3. Where did you find these jokes? Do you know how old they are?

I found most of them in old joke books. A lot of them I found in multiple books, told slightly differently each time. Sometimes a guy would be fucking a donkey, but in a different telling of the joke he’d be fucking a duck, or whatever. Some jokes people told me at bars. Some of the jokes I’ve known for a long time, just heard them from word of mouth, such as the moose joke, I’ve known that one for years.

I don’t specifically know how old any of the jokes are. Most of them I know are at least from the 50s or 60s, since that was the heyday of that type of humor, and that’s when a lot of the books were from. I’m sure a lot are older than that.

4. And some Philly comics gave you jokes as well?

Originally I asked some comics if they had any dirty jokes, but the problem was that their jokes didn’t fit with the style of the rest of the book. They were too obviously modern. Or, they were too short, one-liners. There aren’t many one-liners in the book. Roger Weaver wrote a great one: “What’s the difference between Paris Hilton and a snow leopard? It’s very difficult to find video of a snow leopard mating.” But we couldn’t put it in, because we didn’t use any one-liners.

The one exception is that we used Chip Chantry’s dirty Willie Nelson joke. However, I was able to make a Dirty Willie Nelson jokes sidebar, and that Willie Nelson one-liner was one of four or five Willie Nelson jokes (which Chip also wrote), and we put them all together, so that was different. Yeah, Chip wrote a bunch of dirty Willie Nelson jokes, and we pretended like that was a legitimate genre, as though it’s as common a theme as divorce jokes or pope jokes.

5. What is your favorite dirty joke?

I think it has to be the Moose Joke, because it’s the first dirty joke I ever learned. It’s too long to reprint here, but it’s on page 59 of the book. I also like the one about the two fleas on the beach (page 48), even though it’s not really funny, but it’s so strange, it begins with two fleas suntanning on a beach, I like that. And there was one I really like that they wouldn’t let me put in the book, which is “What’s the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies? I don’t have a Cadillac in my garage.” But they said no dead baby jokes.

6. What makes a good dirty joke?

It’s subjective, but my favorite dirty jokes are those that take place in an alternate reality, a world where crazy shit happens and everyone behaves like it’s normal. Like, there’s a cocktail party and in one corner there’s an elephant with an erect cock, but nobody thinks that’s unusual, that’s not even the punchline, that’s just the setup. A lot of old-timey jokes are like that, they live in an alternate reality. They’re the exact opposite of modern humor, where comedians try to be observational and realistic.

7. Did you write any for the book?

I wrote all the sidebars, all the commentary and the introduction and stuff like “When Is it Appropriate to Tell These Jokes?”. There are a couple different sections about particular genres, such as Pope Jokes, Lonely Lumberjack Jokes, and I wrote that commentary. I also rewrote all the jokes in the book, I didn’t copy any of them verbatim from the source material. I tried to tighten them up, hopefully I improved them.

There’s only one old joke whose punchline I completely changed, and it’s this one:

A woman told her lawyer she was divorcing her husband on the grounds of hobosexuality.

Her lawyer said “I think you mean ‘homosexuality.’”

– – –

Now, the original punchline is “No,” the woman said, “he’s a bum fuck.” But I changed it to “No,” the woman said, “he likes to fuck hobos.”

---

]]> By this time, it appears that we’ve heard everything dirty that you can imagine. Although people are still offended by jokes in certain contexts, there aren’t too many things that are surprisingly too dirty. But that doesn’t mean that dirty jokes aren’t still funny, which Philly stand-up Doogie Horner (profile) shows in the book that he has edited Dirty Jokes Every Man Should Know. Published by Philadelphia’s Quirk Books, where Horner is a graphic designer, the book is a portable compendium of mostly sex jokes taken from various sources (FULL DISCLOSURE: I let Doogie borrow of few of my old joke books), but also features a set of Willie Nelson jokes from comic Chip Chantry (profile). Philly comics Roger Weaver and Conrad Roth (who has since moved to San Francisco) are also thanked, although it’s unclear which jokes they contributed. I tossed a few questions to Doogie by e-mail recently to find out more about the process and allure of dirty jokes. Suffice to say this post is NSFW.

1. Are dirty jokes as relevant as they used to be?

I wouldn’t say they’re less relevant than they used to be, but they’re certainly less uncommon. Fifty years ago there was a distinction between dirty jokes and regular jokes, but these days a lot of jokes that used to be considered dirty are almost quaint.

When I first started the book, I submitted modern dirty jokes, jokes about cancer, pedophilia, rape, murder. And the editors said “Uh, not that dirty.” They wanted jokes that were just kind of ribald.

So, the jokes in the book are definitely throwback jokes, because their smut is old-timey. Also, they needed to be jokes that anyone can tell, that depend on the language, not the delivery. And by nature those kind of jokes are the old Catskill kind. Anyone can tell them.

2. Deep down inside, what do you think it is about dirty jokes that appeals to people?

They’re shocking, they’re naughty. You’re getting away with something when you tell one. You’re not supposed to say “poopy,” but you’re saying it anyways! It gives you a little thrill.

3. Where did you find these jokes? Do you know how old they are?

I found most of them in old joke books. A lot of them I found in multiple books, told slightly differently each time. Sometimes a guy would be fucking a donkey, but in a different telling of the joke he’d be fucking a duck, or whatever. Some jokes people told me at bars. Some of the jokes I’ve known for a long time, just heard them from word of mouth, such as the moose joke, I’ve known that one for years.

I don’t specifically know how old any of the jokes are. Most of them I know are at least from the 50s or 60s, since that was the heyday of that type of humor, and that’s when a lot of the books were from. I’m sure a lot are older than that.

4. And some Philly comics gave you jokes as well?

Originally I asked some comics if they had any dirty jokes, but the problem was that their jokes didn’t fit with the style of the rest of the book. They were too obviously modern. Or, they were too short, one-liners. There aren’t many one-liners in the book. Roger Weaver wrote a great one: “What’s the difference between Paris Hilton and a snow leopard? It’s very difficult to find video of a snow leopard mating.” But we couldn’t put it in, because we didn’t use any one-liners.

The one exception is that we used Chip Chantry’s dirty Willie Nelson joke. However, I was able to make a Dirty Willie Nelson jokes sidebar, and that Willie Nelson one-liner was one of four or five Willie Nelson jokes (which Chip also wrote), and we put them all together, so that was different. Yeah, Chip wrote a bunch of dirty Willie Nelson jokes, and we pretended like that was a legitimate genre, as though it’s as common a theme as divorce jokes or pope jokes.

5. What is your favorite dirty joke?

I think it has to be the Moose Joke, because it’s the first dirty joke I ever learned. It’s too long to reprint here, but it’s on page 59 of the book. I also like the one about the two fleas on the beach (page 48), even though it’s not really funny, but it’s so strange, it begins with two fleas suntanning on a beach, I like that. And there was one I really like that they wouldn’t let me put in the book, which is “What’s the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies? I don’t have a Cadillac in my garage.” But they said no dead baby jokes.

6. What makes a good dirty joke?

It’s subjective, but my favorite dirty jokes are those that take place in an alternate reality, a world where crazy shit happens and everyone behaves like it’s normal. Like, there’s a cocktail party and in one corner there’s an elephant with an erect cock, but nobody thinks that’s unusual, that’s not even the punchline, that’s just the setup. A lot of old-timey jokes are like that, they live in an alternate reality. They’re the exact opposite of modern humor, where comedians try to be observational and realistic.

7. Did you write any for the book?

I wrote all the sidebars, all the commentary and the introduction and stuff like “When Is it Appropriate to Tell These Jokes?”. There are a couple different sections about particular genres, such as Pope Jokes, Lonely Lumberjack Jokes, and I wrote that commentary. I also rewrote all the jokes in the book, I didn’t copy any of them verbatim from the source material. I tried to tighten them up, hopefully I improved them.

There’s only one old joke whose punchline I completely changed, and it’s this one:

A woman told her lawyer she was divorcing her husband on the grounds of hobosexuality.

Her lawyer said “I think you mean ‘homosexuality.’”

– – –

Now, the original punchline is “No,” the woman said, “he’s a bum fuck.” But I changed it to “No,” the woman said, “he likes to fuck hobos.”

]]> http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/29/actually-read-it-dirty-jokes-every-man-should-know-edited-by-doogie-horner/feed/ 1 http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/28/philly-sketchfest-lineup-announced/ http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/28/philly-sketchfest-lineup-announced/#comments Wed, 28 Oct 2009 19:23:43 +0000 Dave Walk http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/?p=3108 Now in it’s second year, the Philly Sketchfest will be held from December 3-5 at the Plays and Players Theatre (1714 Delancey Place). Since last year’s inaugural run, the fest has certainly grown, even inviting sketch groups from Chicago and New York to perform this time. The other new wrinkle this year, beyond that there is an extra day, is that there will be a different stand-up comic every night hosting the shows (last year Chip Chantry hosted all of the shows).

The complete lineup is below, minus the winner of the Helium competition being held on November 18th [show info]. But enough of my yakking, here we go!:

Thursday 12/03 8PM Show
Host: CHIP CHANTRY (Philadelphia)
HELIUM WINNER
BOY MEETS TRACTOR (Swarthmore University)
GENTLEMAN’S ROTARY AUXILIARY (New Jersey)

Thursday 12/03 10PM Show
Host: CHIP CHANTRY
FEEKO BROS. (Philadelphia)
Special Appearance by BING SUPERNOVA (Hollywood)
SIXTH BOROUGH (Philadelphia)

Friday 12/04 8PM Show
Host: STEVE GERBEN (Philadelphia)
THIS THING OF OURS (Philly/New York)
ANIMOSITY PIERRE (Philadelphia)

Friday 12/04 10PM Show
Host: STEVE GERBEN
CHRIS & PAUL SHOW (New York City)
SECRET PANTS (Philadelphia)

Saturday 12/05 8PM Show
Host: KENT HAINES (Philadelphia)
BETTER THAN THE MACHINE (New York City)
THE WAITSTAFF (Philadelphia)

Saturday 12/05 10PM Show
Host: KENT HAINES
THE COOL TABLE (Chicago)
MEG & ROB (Philadelphia)

In related news, producing partners for the fest, sketch group Animosity Pierre are continuing their Mexican Sock Puppet series. Here’s the second episode:

---

]]> Now in it’s second year, the Philly Sketchfest will be held from December 3-5 at the Plays and Players Theatre (1714 Delancey Place). Since last year’s inaugural run, the fest has certainly grown, even inviting sketch groups from Chicago and New York to perform this time. The other new wrinkle this year, beyond that there is an extra day, is that there will be a different stand-up comic every night hosting the shows (last year Chip Chantry hosted all of the shows).

The complete lineup is below, minus the winner of the Helium competition being held on November 18th [show info]. But enough of my yakking, here we go!:

Thursday 12/03 8PM Show
Host: CHIP CHANTRY (Philadelphia)
HELIUM WINNER
BOY MEETS TRACTOR (Swarthmore University)
GENTLEMAN’S ROTARY AUXILIARY (New Jersey)

Thursday 12/03 10PM Show
Host: CHIP CHANTRY
FEEKO BROS. (Philadelphia)
Special Appearance by BING SUPERNOVA (Hollywood)
SIXTH BOROUGH (Philadelphia)

Friday 12/04 8PM Show
Host: STEVE GERBEN (Philadelphia)
THIS THING OF OURS (Philly/New York)
ANIMOSITY PIERRE (Philadelphia)

Friday 12/04 10PM Show
Host: STEVE GERBEN
CHRIS & PAUL SHOW (New York City)
SECRET PANTS (Philadelphia)

Saturday 12/05 8PM Show
Host: KENT HAINES (Philadelphia)
BETTER THAN THE MACHINE (New York City)
THE WAITSTAFF (Philadelphia)

Saturday 12/05 10PM Show
Host: KENT HAINES
THE COOL TABLE (Chicago)
MEG & ROB (Philadelphia)

In related news, producing partners for the fest, sketch group Animosity Pierre are continuing their Mexican Sock Puppet series. Here’s the second episode:

]]> http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/28/philly-sketchfest-lineup-announced/feed/ 4 http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/01/philly-comics-at-the-dc-improv-tonight/ http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/01/philly-comics-at-the-dc-improv-tonight/#comments Thu, 01 Oct 2009 11:45:03 +0000 Dave Walk http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/?p=2884 Perhaps you are reading this from somewhere around the Nation’s Capital. Hey, maybe you’re even from the Philadelphia area originally but now work for a politician down there. Well tonight you should head out to the DC Improv for a night of Philadelphia comedy. Area comic Chris Coccia, who has been teaching a comedy class at the club, is bringing his pals John Kensil, Chip Chantry and Chris Cotton to entertain the folks of the District of Columbia.

And if you go, ask them about the NL East Champs!

---

]]> Perhaps you are reading this from somewhere around the Nation’s Capital. Hey, maybe you’re even from the Philadelphia area originally but now work for a politician down there. Well tonight you should head out to the DC Improv for a night of Philadelphia comedy. Area comic Chris Coccia, who has been teaching a comedy class at the club, is bringing his pals John Kensil, Chip Chantry and Chris Cotton to entertain the folks of the District of Columbia.

And if you go, ask them about the NL East Champs!

]]> http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/10/01/philly-comics-at-the-dc-improv-tonight/feed/ 0 http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/08/19/video-philadelphia-athletes-and-animal-cruelty/ http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/08/19/video-philadelphia-athletes-and-animal-cruelty/#comments Wed, 19 Aug 2009 15:53:52 +0000 Dave Walk http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/?p=2286 It’s been almost a week since Michael “Ron Mexico” Vick joined the Philadelphia Eagles and the town is still talking about it. But did you know that Vick isn’t the first athlete in the city to have a history of animal cruelty? The video below from Johnny Goodtimes and Chip Chantry (profile), originally shown at Chip Chantry’s One Man Show w/ Special Guests this past Monday, explains.

---

]]> It’s been almost a week since Michael “Ron Mexico” Vick joined the Philadelphia Eagles and the town is still talking about it. But did you know that Vick isn’t the first athlete in the city to have a history of animal cruelty? The video below from Johnny Goodtimes and Chip Chantry (profile), originally shown at Chip Chantry’s One Man Show w/ Special Guests this past Monday, explains.

]]> http://www.comicvsaudience.net/blog/2009/08/19/video-philadelphia-athletes-and-animal-cruelty/feed/ 0